#Beherenow

Be here now is something I have always believed In. I was a very impatient person I still am (somewhat) but over the years I have learned to deal with that demon and it’s all by following this simple advice my mother always says: BE HERE NOW.

For some of us the past is appealing and most of us would kill to take a little peak into our future. I’ve thought about it and you’ve thought about it. HOWEVER what is life if we keep worrying about things that might happen and things that already did? Nothing!

Don’t waste your time overthinking instead keep on going, develop a passion to learn, help others (best thing one can do while on earth), be patient, enjoy NOW, take risks, travel (clich√©), laugh, argue, fail, succeed but do it now. Don’t make the mistake of looking back in the future and hating yourself for not smelling the roses.

Take it a day at a time and most importantly do something everyday to make yourself better. Even if it’s as simple as drinking less soda. Be good, be happy, be positive.

MYA

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So it happened, I got Into a confrontation with my supervisor. But before I tell you the story I have to state that I have been reading the book “how to influence people and win friends” by Dale Carnegie which has proven to be a great addition to my limited knowledge of how to deal with other human beings. Anyways it was Friday afternoon, two hours before I had to go home aka happy hour. It was that time on a Friday in which we all throw our papers
in the air and say fuck this. No one in the office was doing anything when all of the sudden I get an email from my supervisor asking me to come into his office. When I do, I get reprimanded for not finishing, what to me was, an insignificant project by Friday. To my defense i was told that the project was due on March 31st. However he felt the need to remind me my position as a rookie executive. Of course my first reaction was a resounding “excuse me” and then a “NO”. However something popped up In my brain and it was like a slap in the face. All of a sudden I was reminded about the principles I learned from Dale Carnegie:
1) Avoid confrontation,
2) SHUT UP, Let the other person talk, let them speak until they have nothing more to say.
3) LISTEN
4) Put yourself in their shoes

And that is exactly what I did, after he threatened me with taking me to HR for insubordination (yes, it got to that level), I let him know that I understand where he is coming from and that I apologize if it seemed like I didn’t. Haha you guys should have seen his face. He didn’t know what to say!

Well as I am walking out of the office the go home (happy hr), he. He calls me into his office, apologizes for reacting that way and then explains that he’s been really stressed lately. So there you go never judge someone they might be going through hell. Be calm and never get into an argument with someone let them be wrong, they’ll come back once they realize you’re right.

Disarm them with the best weapon: Listening.

Forgot my phone, Learned three lessons.

AHHHHH!!, i told myself this morning as my bus to work was taking off and i had realized that I left, LEFT MY PHONE BEHIND.  As you can all imagine i felt mad, sad, lost and preoccupied at the same time.  Did i leave it at home? In/on my car? did i drop it and did not realize? ughh worst feeling possible.  However about 30 mins into my freakout i stopped took a deep breath and realized that it was not that big of a deal, that i could survive without a phone for a day.  So i laugh at myself and take a 30 min nap.

When i usually enter work, i am quiet, concentrated on my phone, either checking the news through twitter or clipboard, planning my next instagram move (lol) or checking emails.  However today was different, i had no distractions so i had to pay attention to the world. I had to listen to the sounds of life that we all deprive ourselves from due to our never ending addiction to electronics.  

Today i was able to listen to the elevator and to notice the new sound on the newly renovated elevators, i was also able to strike conversation with the janitor who actually turns out to be the same nationality as i am and was a trained nurse in the Dominican Republic for FIFTEEN years before having to move to America to provide for his newly born triplets.  This morning i got to appreciate the new painted wall in my office.  This morning i was able to sit in silence in my office, close my eyes and just listen to the sound of quiet before the madness begins, it literally felt like i was meditating without even trying to!!

So today i have learned three important lessons:
1) Smile, relax it will pass

2) DISCONNECT and “smell the roses”, time is not our friend it passes without alerting us.

3) Connect with people not an apparatus.

 

P.S.- Sorry i have been off this for a while, been busy.  As always feel free to write to me your experiences on being without phone/electronics.

 

Laughing

Hey you! Laugh, laugh more often, laugh right now, laugh when you’re mad, laugh when you are crying, laugh when everything seems like its going to shit but just laugh. ¬†We all know that it has been scientifically proven that laughing makes you feel better, so why not do it. ¬†Try this, ¬†every time you are mad walk away and smile for a minute but just smile and you’ll see a change. ¬†

Things i am GRATEFUL that VICTORIA taught me

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While Being a young, able and working is awesome, it is often times easy to forget where one comes from.  Matter of fact i bet 95% of American friends do not even know nor think about where they come from.  This question is usually thought as one reserved for transplants or foreigners however everyone should really reflect where they come from.  The experiences that shaped us to be who we are, the people that were part of those experiences and how through forming part of our experiences those people have also changed.

On my way to work, my mom came to mind.  She moved to America from the Dominican Republic as a single mother in search of a better life FOR her children.  I mean not even for a better apartment, boyfriend, clothes, clubs and events.  This woman, like millions of others, sacrificed her youth and beauty for her children therefore today i am dedicating this post to my beautiful mother, Victoria

These are things i am grateful that YOU taught me:

1) The importance of Learning

I was instilled a deep appreciation for the act of learning.  Learning in any way, whether it was going to school, learning how to change a tire, learning how to do laundry and what not.  I was always told that one can not be beat if one is more apt to learn.

2) The importance of Education

Education has always been something that is expected of the young members of my family. ¬†Thanks for always instilling in me the love and appreciation for it as well as the understanding that i can accomplish whatever i want but first get that degree…. Now at 23, i understand.

3) The importance of feeling Important

My parent always emphasized how important me and my sister were.  Not just in a loving way, for example when i was 6 and had joined little league, my parent always made sure that i knew that even if i missed the ball i was important for the sole reason that i contributed something to each experience, whether bad or good.

4) Finances

To always be alert of my financial status and to always think 10 years ahead when it comes to money…I wish i would have followed that at 17, i would be rich…. Now at 23, i understand.

5) Death

I always taught that old people were the only ones that died until one of my classmates in second grade passed away in a car accident. ¬†I remember my parent telling me: “that is why there is never enough smiles to fill up a day, smile it might be your last”.

6) Santa

I was left under the illusion of Santa Clause until i was 5, when i woke up and saw my parent putting the gifts by the tree.  Thanks for not lying to me and telling me Santa gave you those gifts, thanks for explaining to me the whole story behind it.

7) How to be a gentleman

I might not ALWAYS be one at every second of the day or with every breath i take but due to my parent’s effort to tech me how to behave properly i have gotten very far in some aspects of my short life. ¬†I mean i can get down in a party and be rude if needed be but few of my peers come close to me in manners and treatments in the gentleman department.

8) To stand by my word

Often times we let others influence us faster and easier than what we should allow others to do so. ¬†I was always taught to stand by my word. ¬†To research and scope out a situation but to follow my intuition on it, if I’m wrong well I’m wrong but if I’m right a whole new door opens.

I could go on all day listing things that i am thankful for.  In conclusion i am thankful that i was awarded such a great parent that had worked and sacrificed their life for mine.  I hope one day i get to love my future children as much as she has loved us.

PS.- This blog thing is good to vent, hope that you all can relate or at least think of where you come from and how grateful you should be that you are where you are right now, at this moment.

It’s Cold in New York: How to Stay Productive

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Cold, it is really cold in New York right now, ok it might not be like North Polo cold but it is pretty goddamn cold.  The views and sceneries are great however this winter i have realized that the cold makes me lazy, it gets in the way of my productivity, clouds my thought process and quite frankly i highly dislike it.  Sometimes i think its because i hail from the Caribbean or because i just hate the cold.  

However these past few weeks that has been unbearably cold and i have found some ways that work for me to stay concentrated. On a snow day, like today, i got a lot of things accomplished: 1) made a budget, 2) cleaned my room, 3) called relatives that i had not spoken to in a long time, 4) shoveled my driveway, 5) read two chapters of a book , 6) caught up on my favorite show, 7) wrote a blogpost, 8) will turn all the lights off and relax an hour before i fall to sleep to start tomorrow the right way. Now the whole time i was doing all these things i felt like crawling under my blanket and just sleeping the day off but like most things in Human life, shit is not easy and wasting a day of my 23rd year of life to sleep is not an option.

P.S. drop a comment or give any suggestion/ways to combat winter idleness ūüôā

Stay Warm North East.

“Push On, Push On…it will come a time that pushing will become cruising” – F.R.B.

Everyday is a Friday BUT Today is a Monday

2014-02-03 12.26.28 1Oh Monday!

Ughh Monday! Why is it Monday? Fuck it’s Monday again, Ahh no worries is just cause its Monday <—– These are some of the common sayings i hear every Monday from people. ¬†We are all guilty of hating mondays. It is the BEGINNING of a workweek, the weekend is as far as it can be. ¬†It is usually the day to catch up on the leftover work from Thursday or Friday or get new work/assignments. ¬†Monday is Monday and we have all been programmed to hate it! ¬†While watching the Superbowl (Seattle!!) me and my sister’s were having a “deep” discussion about how Mondays are the worst day of the week when all of the sudden my mom she gets up and on her broken english says “EVERYDAY IS A FRIDAY!! so stop complaining and get ready for work tomorrow”. ¬†She is currently reading Joel Osteen’s famous ¬†self improvement book “Everyday is a Friday”. Now i am not a big fan of the guy nor read any of his books but this got to me, something clicked. As a young adult trying to survive and start a respectable business career in the city of dreams, NYC, it is easy to fall into the habits of others. ¬†When i was in college i never hated Mondays, i mean maybe because i lived in the beautiful and protected bliss that college was but i never even paid attention to Mondays let alone the what day of the week was.

Since i started my job almost every single person i speak to has something to say about Monday. ¬†“How was your weekend? Good! ughh its monday” Or when the two o clock slump hits i always hear “Its because its a Monday, i hate Mondays” So after doing some self reflection i have realized that Mondays are not so bad and maybe Joel Osteen is right.

Treat everyday like a Friday.  Get the excitement to go to work, to get work done, to advance and develop your skills everyday.  Instead of blaming unproductiveness and tasks on Monday, smile and enjoy the day. Be thankful for your job, your family, your iPod, your toes, your hands, be thankful for everything you have. Regardless if its a Monday, Wednesday, Sunday or Tuesday at the end (if you think about it) it does not matter, the day will pass and it will come again and again!

Our mentality and thoughts do not change unless we do. ¬†So from now on i will¬†challenge myself to embrace this Monday 02/03/14, to refrain from saying “ughh its monday” and start saying” YESS MONDAY!” beginning of a productive work week!!! I challenge YOU, YOUNG MILLENNIAL to do the same, who knows it might actually help and change some of our self imposed negative thoughts into positive productive ones ūüôā

LESSON: LEARN TO EMBRACE THE GRIND NOT HATE IT

PS.- Excuse my writing i promise, i will work on getting better.